Submitting to Tyranny and Drinking too Much Coffee

Why do some people do things against their best interests?

Why do people so often vote against their own best interest? This is a critique aimed at those who, for the sake of ideology, choose actions that harm themselves. It can seem like a masochistic move to say, “I’ll vote for something that takes away my liberties, my benefits, my autonomy.” And yet, people do this all the time. People live under dictatorships and in communist countries, and they are willing participants in those systems. Here, I talk about how the major choices we make: who to vote for, who to marry, where to live, are often the same as the smaller choices we make: what we’ll have for lunch, how we talk to others, what goals to check off. I’ll explore how much of our thinking and acting comes from our sense of alienation to who we are and how we can slowly integrate these parts to have a more holistic sense of self.

Photo by Jonathan Sanchez on Unsplash

There’s one Putin, one Kim Jong Un, one Min Aung Hlaing of Myanmar—and there are millions under them. This happens because people somehow believe these individuals have more power, more ability, more control than they themselves do. And yet, history has shown us that revolutions break out, kings are beheaded, dictatorships collapse overnight.

At the same time, dictators and fascists aren’t acting in their own best interests either. They don’t sleep well knowing their power is always tentative, always volatile. One person reported that Putin doesn’t like to eat with others and employs a food tester as part of his security protocols. These leaders govern against their own best interests. They sacrifice their own freedom, benefits, and happiness.

So what is it in human psychology and behavior that leads us to act this way, even if—at the same time—I believe human nature exists for the sake of happiness?

Let’s start there.

Unlike many theologians, I have a positive view of human nature and humanity. We are all created in God’s image (imago Dei) and we pursue the good—for ourselves and for others. All our intentions are ultimately good, but the way we go about them often fails because we either 1) don’t know how to get what we want, or 2) don’t act in ways that will actually get us what we want. As a result, we end up violating what would truly benefit us in the end.

I’m writing this in a coffee shop and just had an iced coffee with a splash of cream. Minimum calories. Nice boost to help me write. I only drink one cup a day. But that easily turns into addiction. Still, my intention was good: coffee is part of my writing ritual. It gives my brain a boost in the morning. However, if I’m drinking it out of habit rather than intention, it becomes something else entirely. But I know people who need their coffee—who get splitting headaches and digestive issues without it. They know this and still drink it. What started as positive intent becomes something done against their best interest.

And yet, I’ll say this again: no one does anything against their own good. Even people who commit acts of self-harm believe they’re alleviating pain or agony. When biblical writers talk about “sin,” they’re using a non-religious word that means “to miss the mark.” The Hebrew word chata refers to someone aiming a sling with such precision they could hit a single hair on their opponent. To not sin was to hit the mark. Eventually, the word was used religiously to describe someone failing to keep God’s covenant.

Photo by Valery Tenevoy on Unsplash

But no one intends to miss. No one wakes up and says, I want to murder someone today. They do it in rage or revenge. They do it because they think it will offer some good—relief, satisfaction, justice. It begins with a desire to satisfy something they don’t know how to handle. Again, it’s either a lack of knowledge or a failure to adopt behaviors that could help them meet their need.

To say that there’s something innate in us that constantly chooses what’s bad for us is to deny the image of God, to deny human agency, and the capacity for goodness. If we believe that healing is possible—that people can stop acting out of woundedness and start acting out of wholeness—then that’s a very different kind of theology. Can I dare say, a healing theology?

Some theologians have called this original blessing rather than original sin, a term coined by Matthew Fox. In his book Original Blessing, Fox explores “creation spirituality” rather than the old fall/redemption model. The idea is this: God’s creation is steeped in blessing, and you can hear echoes of this in Jesus’ first sermon.

But this notion of God’s continual presence goes back even further—to the earliest theologians of the Church, the Eastern Fathers (and Mothers). They insisted that God never leaves or forsakes us. What we experience as separation is really alienation—a distorted perception of ourselves and others.

So how does this relate to doing things against our best interests?

Often, when we’re reaching for something good, we’re disconnected from the thing we actually want. We’re afraid we won’t get it. So we settle for a shadow. For example, I know that finishing this chapter brings me one step closer to getting published. Getting published means reaching readers. Reaching readers means I get to serve others with my words.

And yet, I find a million things to distract me. They become excuses. Finishing the chapter feels like a mountain instead of a small habit. Everything else becomes a detour from my best interest. Why?

Is it because I’m lazy? Easily distracted?

But I’m not lazy when it comes to things I care about. I can concentrate intensely. The issue is I’m disconnected from what I truly want. I’m alienated from myself.

We all want security, safety, and certainty—which, by the way, is the subject of my next book—but the ways we chase those needs often derail us from our deeper goals: to grow, to discover, to reach beyond ourselves.

Why? Because the act of reaching itself is scary. We fear failure. We fear not getting what we truly want. We fear embarrassment, shame, and disappointment. So we default to the lizard brain. The part that keeps us safe. It’s a good thing—it kept us alive for millions of years. But it’s not what allows an individual to flourish.

Human progress—discovery, technology, innovation—only happened because people pushed beyond survival.

In Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi shares an example from the Secwépemc tribe in Canada. The indigenous peoples there would settle in places with abundant resources and live comfortably. But every 25–30 years, the elders would make the whole tribe move—not out of necessity, but for growth. To explore. To be challenged. To avoid stagnation. They knew flourishing required more than safety. It required change, movement, even discomfort.

Too often, our reasons for doing what we do get tangled up in religious dogma—complex theories layered on top of one another. No wonder Jesus never talked about original sin or even the Jewish teaching on the dual inclinations: yetzer ha-tov and yetzer ha-ra (the good and bad impulse). We simply act in ways we think will get us what we want—whether they do or not is another matter.

When we’re stuck, that’s the moment to step back and ask: where did I miss the mark? That’s when we can seek help—through family, friends, community, therapy, or other means. Sometimes they can help. Sometimes they can’t. Maybe we need to drink a little less coffee and cut the jitters. But most of us have the internal resources to act in our own best interest—and in the interest of others.

The question is: are we willing to open our eyes and see them?

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Consider these questions:

• Are you thinking, believing, and acting in your best interest—and in the interest of others? How much of your decision-making is driven by a need for security, safety, and certainty?

• What would it feel like to move through life with both a sense of security and the spirit of discovery?

• How might we resist falling prey to fear-mongering voices in media and politics that ask us to trade away our liberties, desires, and happiness?

If you have not had a chance to purchase Jesus and Buddha Talk: On Desire, Suffering, and Happiness please follow the link here.

As always, thank you for your continued support. Peace!